One of the more common issues I encounter with unhappy clients is their tendency to assume that their life choices are the only right or correct choice. This is especially true when it comes to religion, politics, and other strong beliefs that we assume represent “truth”.
It is very easy to fall into this trap when we assume that we are only being “helpful”.
Achieving happiness and true friendship means allowing others to choose their own life path and dropping our judgments about their choices.
If we want the right to determine our own path and choices in life, then we have to be willing to stop judging the paths and choices that others make. We can’t have it both ways.
Our primitive ego of course, is judgmentally convinced that “our”path and “our” life choices are the only correct ones. This is a dangerous form of arrogance that will quickly create conflict in our relationships with the people in our lives that we are trying to “help”.
Experiencing true happiness means not only allowing others to make their own choices free of our primitive ego judgmentalism, we have to learn how to actually affirm their choices. We might not make that particular choice, but it is the one they have chosen.
The spiritual practice of “allowing” reality to be “what it is” will encourage and support others as they work toward making their dreams and desires come true. It will not only create empathy and kindness in your relationships with others, it will make your life more peaceful. Being “helpful” is nothing more than ego inflation—-and it is rarely “helpful”.
Stated simply, judgmentalism of how others have chosen to live their lives is a sure path to conflict and unhappiness. You will not only sound critical and arrogant, you will have very few friends.